About 4 years ago I journalled about how I was feeling about being over-weight.  I was at my all time heaviest and was not feeling good about myself at all.  My blood work results didn’t look good and I was suffering from aches and pains.  I was 36 years old and I felt 80. This was the start of my journey to better health. Check out the photo below. That’s me in 2010.

This is what I wrote:

“I took some time to reflect on all the things I didn’t like about being overweight. But, instead of harping on the negative I thought I would rather turn it around and vision about all the things I am going to enjoy about being thin instead!

A very wise person once told me that you need to visualise where you want to be and hold onto that vision and repeatedly revisit it so that it remains top of mind. It should be what drives your behaviour each day. So here are some points I came up with.

When I am at a healthy weight, I am going to love:

• looking and feeling normal in my own skin
•  having energy to do fun and exciting things
•  being able to walk into a shop and buy clothes and not come home depressed
• not being the fat girl in a crowd of friends
• wearing a bathing costume without feeling embarrassed
• not having to wear a sarong until the last possible moment before quickly diving into the pool
• fitting into an aeroplane seat and still having room to move about
• not spilling over sideways in the plastic chairs at church
• not feeling like an 80 year old granny every time I need to get up off the floor
• walking in front of someone and not thinking, “oh flip all they can see is my big bum”!!!
• having thighs that don’t rub together when I walk
• not being obsessed with my weight issue and food, so that I can focus on other things
• feeling attractive and feminine
• looking in the mirror and feeling proud of my achievement and excited about how discipline, faith, hope and passion can help me achieve anything that I put my mind to.“

I have come a long way since then and I have achieved many of the things listed above. I am now at the half way mark on my road to health. 15 kilos still to go. It has been a long, long slog but I think there is a lesson in here for me about patience. It has never been one of my strengths. I believe that my struggle will not be in vain. My Primal Perks blog is testimony to how struggles can motivate you to do things you wouldn’t have dreamed of doing. If my writing and my story can help other people become healthier, then it was worth it.

This is me in December 2013.   I now have more confidence, energy and better health than ever before.

I am so grateful to the Primal, Paleo, LCHF movement for giving me back my health and happiness. I now look forward to the next half of my journey. I can’t wait to tick off the rest of the items I listed 4 years ago. In the meantime I will keep visioning about all the things I have to look forward to when I am thin.

Note: Not “if” but “when“.  Cause its gonna happen! Just not yesterday as would be my preference.